Diary entry #7

I return to the cold of my room. It seems it’s even colder than before. But then again, it’s evening already and the Romanian winter is the most fierce one I know.

Oh my, did something move on the table? I rush towards it… Oh, silly me, it’s just a piece of paper moving in the wind. Next to it, the book still stands unmoved. What if… What if I look at it again? What if I could find out more about myself by reading it? What if this would be the way of seeing right through myself? But no, no… It’s just a joke, I can’t rely on such a fake interpretation of myself.

But still… There’s something different, I have this weird feeling in my stomach. I just can’t my rationale. I raise it, move my hand along the cover, grab the corner and turn over to the first page.

My heart stands still for a few seconds. Gia wasn’t joking. It actually is Grimm Brothers’ bedtime story collection…

Diary entry #6

I couldn’t believe she was lying to my face just like that. And God those people staring are so annoying. A little guy in the back with a huge clay of hair raises his hand and calls out:- Gia! Can I talk to you for a second?

She turns her head:

- Yeah, sure… Elodie, jut a second, ok? Then we’ll talk about it.

Whispers:

- You gave her the book I bought you?

- *sighs* Are you going to make a huge fuss over this?

- *raising his voice* But she’s totally wrong for it! Can’t you see? She’s just not seeing right. And she’s so impolite!

- Chris, stop it. We’ll talk about this later, ok?

She walks up to me again and puts a hand on my face, caressing me slowly:

- I gave you the bedtime story collection because I thought you’d like a piece of your childhood with you at night, before sleep. I know how being lonely in a new place is. I’m sorry if I made the wrong choice. You can bring it back and choose something else, I have a whole bunch more, ok?

I’m completely in shock. After all that display of lies and gossip, all I get is an apology for making the wrong choice. Something is extremely peculiar here and I’m going to get to the bottom of this. I’ll just play along … for now.

- It’s ok, no problem, I think I over-reacted too… Please excuse me, tell your guests I’m sorry and I guess we’ll talk later, ok?

- Sure. Bye-bye!

I turned around, the door closes, the silence continues. I guessed I ruined a party, didn’t I?

Diary entry #5

My hands are trembling with remorse. Why did I have to read it? It sounds just like I’m the one writing that stupid book. “The Delusion” my ass. It’s a conspiracy. That Gia… I don’t care about her guests, I’m going over to her and I’m going to get an explanation for all this. What a stupid manner of welcoming a neighbour…

I leave the book on the table, quickly put on my slippers and clumsily go out through the door next to Gia’s.

- Knock, knock!

She opens the door. About five people are having glasses of wine in front of a great big red coffee table.

- Oh, hello, Elodie. Care for a drink?

- Hi again. No… Uhm, not really. I turn pale for a second, as the people inside are pausing their conversations and staring back at me. I hang on to the last piece of courage I have left and involuntarily start raising my voice at her: What exactly is this novel you sent me? Is this a joke? Who put you up to this?

Her mouth opens in astonishment and she tries to babble something:

- Oh, uhm… You don’t like bedtime stories?

- Bedtime stories? With Grey clowns and delusions and other horrific displays of humor? Those are bedtime stories for you?

- What are you talking about? It’s just a Special Edition for Grimm Brothers’ Story Collection…

Diary entry #4

What is this? A joke? Some kind of idiotic novel about the rise and fall of a clown? Some kind of set of delusional orgies with clowns??? I sat at my window watching the dawning landscape and, even thought knowing my Psycho-somatic illnesses paper was by far not over yet, I just couldn’t help my curiosity. I had to see at least what it’s about.

Chapter One

She died today. I was born.

My name is Elodie and unlike many of the people around me, I’m a very stable person. I know when to take things seriously and when to joke around, I don’t lose my head when I’m in a tricky situation, I always make the best decisions…

Whaaaat? What is this?? My heartbeat is racing rapidly as I close my eyes and try to wake up. Am I dreaming?

I always make the best decisions I can make. I’m perfect and everybody else thinks this too. I think my principles beat yours, my moral sense is very well developed. I like long walks on the beach, I dream of giving my money away to charity, I dream of flying to South Africa and feeding the hungry and helping the sick.

I never stopped believing in angels…